You arrived with a bunch of our “season-friends”,
smile from cheek to cheek
as if you had swallowed the sun.
My heart fluttered,
“He is here”, “he really came”
A wonderful summer could not come to a better end.
More than a hundred very special people,
connected in ways most outsiders never would understand
gathered in the evening sun this day in August.
the bar open,
the band playing,
the buffet inviting everyone to celebrate.
The air was alive,
the hearts were filled to the brim,
the beer was cold.
“Will you come with me?”
“Yes”, I whispered.
Your hands were warm.
“Tonight I have to host this party but tomorrow I am all yours.
We have the rest of our lives ahead of us”.
My words held a promise.
young, fearless and bright
amidst this crowd of connected spirits,
snowflakes being our glue.
It is night.
I lie here curled up against his body.
My face drowning in his naked chest,
my whole being shivering, quaking.
I try to breathe slow,
but I can´t.
One ear rests against his heart,
taking in the constant “thuck, thuck, thuck”,
the powerful blood,
the elixir of life pumping through his veins,
My other ear is listening to a different “thuck, thuck, thuck”,
the sound of the heavy coast guard helicopter,
surveilling the dark waters,
looking for your body,
yet so real.